Henry Cavill flexes his muscles as Theseus in the visually stunning

Aisle Seat: Immortals is all brawn over brains

Morning Star movie reviewer Jason Armstrong gives the lush looking, story lacking Immortals two-and-a-half stars out of five.

  • Nov. 18, 2011 3:00 p.m.

In case you didn’t get a good enough dose of blood-soaked bone crunching during the summer in Conan The Barbarian, here comes Immortals –– a 3D movie with a blueprint resembling 300, but with a thick layer of cheese all its own.

Visually, Immortals is a beauty –– vivid and jammed with visceral wonder, there are few movies out there as good looking as this one.

The problem is, there isn’t a whole lot more to this. Of course, if your prime reason for buying a ticket is to have limbs and goop flying out at you:

A) Seek therapy, and soon.

B) Enjoy. Here’s the gem you’ve been waiting for.

Henry Cavill (future Superman) plays Theseus, a peasant whose village is being targeted by King Hyperion (a hammed-up Mickey Rourke), who has declared war on mankind.

Theseus puts up a good fight, but loses both family and friends to Hyperion and his army.  With vengeance fuelling him, Theseus seeks out (with help from the virgin oracle played by Freida Pinto) a sacred bow with special powers that will help him battle Hyperion in the war to end all wars. Or something like that.

Again, Immortals isn’t likely to disappoint action fans who enjoy a little edge to their entertainment, as the plentiful battle scenes (although there are lulls in between) come complete with head smooshing and impaling galore. In 3-D, no less. But director Tarsem Singh is so obsessed with creating a visual goodie, he abandons the art of storytelling early on in this one.

The feature is currently playing at Galaxy Cinemas in Vernon.

–– Jason Armstrong is the longtime film reviewer for The Morning Star.

 

 

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

Vernon golf course to host national event local qualifier

The Rise hosts the RBC PGA Scramble qualifier Sunday, July 26

UPDATED: Interior Health to add 495 long-term seniors care beds

Nelson, Kelowna, Kamloops, Vernon and Penticton to receive new facilities

Boardwalk closures ahead for Vernon cyclists, pedestrians

Next phase of storm rehab project will see closures of up to 20 minutes

Missing woman last seen in Lumby

Vernon North Okanagan RCMP seek public’s help in locating 32-year-old woman

Vernon RCMP look to return stolen bike to owner

If you are missing your bike from Cenotaph park on July 5, call Vernon RCMP

Vernon Mounties share video of cyclist hit by vehicle, assaulted

Police release short video clip of cyclist struck by SUV in March 2020, and photos of suspects

Village of Keremeos looks to dismantle systemic racism

Mayor says the time is right to deconstruct racist institutions

Penticton woman struck by mystery bullet

Woman suffers no major injuries; RCMP without any leads, investigation continues

COVID-19 exposure on Kelowna flight

Interior Health has capacity to test individuals who need it, but is reminding everyone that testing is not required for those who do not have symptoms

Kelowna COVID-19 cluster identified after private parties

Risks ‘considerably higher’ while attending private events, said Health Minster Adrian Dix

Use of safety flares prompt search on Shuswap Lake

Marine search and rescue crew finds boat unoccupied, no one in distress

Foul play not currently suspected in death of man found near Sicamous

Body found in woods near vehicle linked Edmonton Police Service investigation of suspicious death

Drive-by shooting in Kamloops

This is the second drive-by shooting in the city in the last two weeks

Revelstoke RCMP searching Columbia River for possible body

Boats and aircrafts are searching the area

Most Read