A thief came on to my deck and stole my son’s bike and my round metal table which it was locked too.
I just wanted you to know you that you stole from an outstanding member of the community. Coltan has a severe speech delay but that doesn’t stop him from volunteering with the Vernon Vipers.
I hope you needed Coltan’s birthday bike (which I had bought last year) more than he does. You probably looked real cool pushing a bike and carrying a table that is attached to the front tire of the bike.