Sporting quotes from all over

The best sports quotes from 2014, and a few retro classics...

If laughter is indeed the best medicine out there, please keep reading for some of the funniest sports quotes from all over in 2014, and some retro classics. And have yourself a fabulous 2015.

n We tried everything. We played four white guys and an Egyptian. — Louisville Cardinals men’s basketball coach Rick Pitino responding to the suggestion he was running up the score after beating Savannah State 87-26,

n Some guys play hockey. Gretzky plays 40 mph chess.” — Lowell Cohn, Sportswriter

n I didn’t know if he had enough left tonight. But I did know that boy would try to steal a steak off the devil’s plate.” — San Francisco Giants pitcher and World Series MVP Madison Bumgarner’s father, Kevin, after his son earned the save in Game 7,

n It’s absolutely brilliant, but I’m not going for it.” — Los Angeles Lakers’ guard Kobe Bryant on the idea of taking a “hometown discount,”

n She actually is. I’m not going to lie. She really is. — UFC fighter Miesha Tate on rival Ronda Rousey, after she was asked whether Rousey “was stinky,”

n Five letters here just for everybody out there in Packer-land: R-E-L-A-X.” — Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers after the team’s 1-2 start.

n “This year, I’d like to steal a team plane.” — Greg Minton, Giants’ reliever, on what his goals were for the 1984 Major League season.

n It was miserable. I hated it. But it was great fun.” — LSU Tigers head football coach Les Miles on his family vacation to Austin, Texas (to visit his daughter who is on the Texas Longhorns’ swim team)

n “Spinks doesn’t need a weigh-in. He needs a way out.” — comedian Jackie Mason forecasting the Mike Tyson-Michael Spinks fight in 1988.

n You can tell they really wanted to run crossing routes, but on the first one they met Kam Chancellor.” —Seattle Seahawks’ linebacker Bobby Wagner on strong safety Chancellor’s huge, tone-setting hit on Denver Broncos’ wideout Demaryius Thomas in Super Bowl XLVIII,

n It’s almost exciting to think about all the room for improvement that we have.” — New York Jets’ quarterback Geno Smith sees the glass half-full.

n Some guys score and some guys don’t. We got a lot that don’t.” – Detroit Red Wings’ coach Mike Babcock.

n I lost my balance, making my body unstable and falling on top of my opponent. At that moment I hit my face against the player leaving a small bruise on my cheek and a strong pain in my teeth. — Barcelona forward Luis Suarez’s official statement after biting Italy’s Giorgio Chiellini while playing for Uruguay during the 2014 FIFA World Cup.

n They both wear No. 12.”  — New England Patriots’ head coach Bill Belichick when asked to comment on the similarities/differences between quarterbacks Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers (before walking off the podium),

n “We knew we had 20 minutes left to put it all out there and then (d-man Keith) Yandle said: ‘We can’t lose on Bobblehead Night.’” —  Mike Smith after the Coyotes rallied to beat the Caps on Mike Smith Bobblehead Night.

n Homers, bro. Chicks dig the long ball. Score ‘em all, bro. Just be the chauffeur, driving them home.” – Nick Swisher.

n When I played pro football, I never set out to hurt anyone deliberately – unless it was, you know, important, like a league game or something.” – Dick Butkus of the Chicago Bears.

n “I remember what Ron Greschner said when he retired. ‘The thing I’m going to miss most is showering with 23 guys.’ And that’s what it’s all about: camaraderie.” Rangers’ goalie Mike Richter, about six months before announcing his retirement.

n “My best drinker couldn’t drink and my best goal scorer was the best drinker.” — Don Cherry, on coaching the Colorado Rockies.

n “I walk into the clubhouse today and it’s like walking into the Mayo Clinic. We have four doctors, three therapists and five trainers. Back when I broke in, we had one trainer who carried a bottle of rubbing alcohol, and by the seventh inning he’d already drunk it.” – Tommy Lasorda.

n “Why is a puck called a puck? Because dirty little bastard was taken.” – goalie Martin Brodeur.

n “The truth is, I’d give it all up to be a rock star.” — Don Ohlmeyer, NBC Sports producer.

n Sammy (Pollock) sent me down on a 24-hour recall, but he must of meant 24 years because he hasn’t called me up yet.” — former Vancouver Canuck captain Larry McNabb.

n “You can’t think and hit at the same time. “ — Yankee catcher Yogi Berra.

n “Who’s smarter? A guy going nowhere in hockey, playing in the snow in Wisconsin or a guy going nowhere in hockey, playing in the sun in San Diego (USIU Gulls, NCAA)?” — Edmonton’s Mickey McMarthy.

n “To play nose tackle in the NFL, you have to be unemployed or crazy. I was unemployed. The other part is still up in the air.” — Bob Golic of the Cleveland Browns.

n “Cross country skiing’s not a sport, it’s how a (bleeping) Swede goes to the 7-Eleven.” — author Dan Jenkins, in You Gotta Play Hurt.


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